i dont like getting sentimental but i really wanna thank a few people cos recently ive been in such a rut and theyve been there giving me all the support and encouragement i needed. yeah so here goes, please bear with me :)

[gen.] -- hey chihuahua babe, adopt the mentality, lets all get skinny and hairy! hohoho! anyway really thank God for you, really. for being there even tho u have A's and for hearing all my whining and crapping and for just being there. youve always been someone i can count on and i really just wanna say that i appreciate it, sincerely i do and i want to let u know that you'll always be special to me as my heroine! :) of cos u know i do love you hahaha

[angie.] -- angiellllla my dear ogre. heh, thanks for being around for boks, and for sharing with me yr advice and encouragement. i thank God that theres someone in the comm who i can speak to so freely without having to mince my words or anything. thanks for being around, really appreciate it.. especially the recent weeks, where we've been just studying together, im really glad to have u around...... of cos no more dawn services for you.................... :p

[eve.] -- sleepycow dear! even tho we havent been talking much and all, thanks for being a listening ear. u know what im thinking, and yr right, nothing has changed. i will always be one step behind you in whatever u do, thankyou dear. *hugs*

[steph.] -- cookiemonster! :):) ive never been so amused by anyone before.. haha u really make me laugh, and thats good especially when im feeling like shit. u say the right things, and all our late nites on the phone have really helped me realise how thankful i am for you being around. yup cookie cookie starts with C! :p

[lingx.] -- reachhhh for the stars!! :) yr encouragement, ill always remember. just a simple thankyou for everything :)

[jim.] -- oi, thanks for replying my mail. it meant alot, and im thankful for that :)

=) supposed to be working but........................................

dont mind me, i AM at work. just taking a short break after covering 20 blocks?!!

haha laters.

so dam tired. eyebags... diediedie. owell going to work soon.. need the extra bucks. anyway, been really sleepy the whole morning.. had worship prac last nite and it was good heh enjoyed myself terribly. haha i want to drink beer... hahaha anyway cycled overnight last nite but renita kept whining haha.. anyway will type more later.. have to work :(

1month to my birthday, 2-3weeks till you return, less then a month to christmas, less den two months to exams. die. diedie!

[im six feet from the edge and im thinking, maybe six feet aint so far down.]

happy birthday prince of egypt, jimmy!!!
heyyy jimmy, this is yr fave colour! hahaha anyway its been really great knowing you. yr a great friend i know i can always turn to if i need help and if i need advice, or if i simply need a friend. thanks for all yr encouragement and all the times we've gone out and grown fat on good food and nice movies haha.. anyway its been a really good year being yr co-cell leader and friend.. ull always be a dear friend to me, and one of the few guy friends that i can tell most of my stuff to! its truly been a blessing getting to know u better this year!! have a happy 21st birthday and enjoy your day!! God bless you pal!! :)

met kookooy for breakfast, quite amazed at how i managed to wake up at 9 plus and take a bus down to serene and actually be there on time! considering that i sleep abt 24hours a week? yeah, anyway it was good to meet up with her, and she gave me a comic! thanks mooky, yup, met lingx on the way to town, haha she was so blur and loooked so tired, poor girl. anyway went to town to meet renita and we ate and just window shopped and erm followed mr x. haha anyway was taking the bus home when the bus passed by orchard fairground where they were setting up a funfair for christmas time, and it just suddenly got me thinking.

i remember the time where i was close to this friend of mine and we went to the river hongbao funfair and it was really fun taking all the rides and spinning around on that chair thingy haha and he kept screaming and making noise, it was really quite funny, and he kinda has a fear of heights, but yup all in all it was a fun time, we even took the ferris wheel! hahaha den we headed to thai express for tom yum soup and dinner and he couldnt take the heat!! haha and i challenged him to take 5 spoons of the soup continously and he unknown of the fact that i was a spice queen took up the challenge and ended up having to drink alot of water! haha.. we talked alot and he introduced me to the kallang river place where i can just scream my heart out, like yesterday. i screamed and screamed. phew. yeah remember taking long walks with him.. he's really a sweet and nice friend who always asked how i am.. haha always a good pal to me, even now. but sadly we've drifted and we're not that close anymore.. but i still thank him for the period where we were close cos it helped me get over a few things and ive made a good friend in him! yup, its just quite sad that time really pulls people apart, heh but at least he's still a friend :)

dont know why the sudden thought about all that, but yeah just a simple sadness larh. anyway yup, feeling better. just quite aghasted by the way certain people work. owellll... tata!

i'm here without you baby
but you're still on my lonely mind

im bored, i wanna go gym and i wanto be a chihuahua. hi? woof.

Name Four Bad Habits You Have:
*burping super loudly
*being insanely obvious
*very slow.
*biting my nails subconsciously

Name Four Things That You Wish You Had:
*joy
*sony vaio! wooot*
*a scholarship
*muscles hahaha

Name Five Scents You Love:
*ralph
*when im out of the shower
*clinique's happy
*raspberry lip balm
*fried fish

Name Four People That Know You the Best:
* gen
* eve
* winston
* angie for now haha

Name Four Things You'd Never Wear:
* pink pants
* yellow underwear
* powerpuff designed bras
* a choker

Name Four Things You Are Thinking About Now:
* i want to be a chihuahua
* whats for dinner and am i going gym?
* gym very far leh
* i feel like eating stingray for dinner.

Name Four Things That You Have Done Today
*woke up late and went to get sth from school
*ate katong laksa with boys
*ate swensens earthquake with boys and angie
*studied at bk with angie n zac and met gen later yay!

Name the Last Four Things You Have Bought:
* erm christmas cards from taka
* corrinne may's cd
* dove soap hahahaha
* new specs haha

Name Five Bands/Groups Most People Don't Know You Like:
* westlife hahah
* green day
* 5566. ahhahaha NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO hehe
* blue haha
* sister hazel

Name Five Drinks You Regularly Drink:
*ice lemon tea
*lipton tea/coffee
*lemon barley
*soya bean
*juice. ahah so healthy.

First Grade Teacher Name?
* mrs eu shwu ling. she was nice, had a round face and wore specs. hahahaha

Last Words You Said:
* errr whats for dinner

Last Song You Sang?
* sometimes love just aint enough

Last Person You Hugged?
* angiE.

Last Thing You Laughed At?
* hahah the CHIHUAHUA. haha

Last Time You Said 'I Love You' And Meant It?
* i always mean it.

Last Time You Cried?
* forgot liao

What's In Your CD Player?
* norah jones

What Color Socks Are You Wearing?
* not wearing any. haha

What's Under Your Bed?
* if i look ill be buried.

What Time Did You Wake Up Today?
* 11plus

Current Taste?
* cheese dips hahaha

Current Hair?
* messy. its always messy btw.

Current Clothes?
* my rg410 netball carn shirt haha and colourful shorts haha

Current Annoyance?
* my eyes are red and tired.

Current Longing?
* to be free from emotions.

Current Desktop Picture?
* the sun shot i took heh, nice nice!!

Current Worry?
* how do i control my feelings

Current Hate?
* eeeeeeeks none.

Favorite Physical Feature Of The Opposite Sex?
* eyes, most definitely

Last CD You Bought?
* corrinne may

Favorite Place To Be?
* home and in my bed.

Least Favorite Place?:
* jurong point. hahahaha.

Time You Wake Up In The Morning?
* depending. recently its been 7 or 11. haha 7-11! :p

If You Could Play An Instrument?:
* i can! haha would like to learn the flute and the drums properly

Favorite Color?
* blue, orange, black, white, steel blue

Do You Believe In An Afterlife?
* no just an eternal one.

How Tall Are You?
* senstive question!!!!! :( ahhahaha

Current Favorite Word/Saying?
* holyshit. mooo. oh mymymymy. haha

Favorite Book?
* anything by nicholas sparks

Favorite Season?
* winter

One Person From Your Past You Wish You Could Go Back And Talk To:
* hamburger, my kindergarten boyfriend. hahaha

Favorite Day?
* fridays. heh

Where Would You Like To Go?
* paris
* switzerland
* greece
* carl's jr in the US

What Is Your Career Going To Be Like?
* relaxing.
* going to have conversations with the dishwasher
* i can picture myself juggling the plates
* i can picture all the broken plates.

How Many Kids Do You Want?
* 2-3

Favorite Car?
* lexus
* porsche 911!

Type A Line You Remember From Any Book:
romeo romeo where fore art thou romeo??!

A Random Lyric:
*wo xiang jiu zhe yang qian zhe ni de shou bu fang kai.

Identify Some Of The Things Surrounding Your Computer:
* my phone, home phone, hair tie, cds and cd covers, ring, watch, pepsi bottle, my photos

Can't you see that you're smothering me
Holding too tightly
Afraid to lose control
Cause everything that you thought I would be
Has fallen apart right in front of you

every step that i take is another mistake to you.

some people change
but lets face up to it, its reality. and someone told me before that you can't change the person, you can only stand by and watch her/him grow or change or whatever larh, but u get my point. so yeah ill just stand by and be around if you need anything, just holler and ill come by asap. recently been in a pithole, feelings fluctuating almost 24/7, and it can be frightening, even to myself. but at least the past few days or nights, have been really good and happier, and ive learnt a whole lot more things about myself, and others. and this whole path of "discovery" hasnt been easy. struggling with pride, with my own emotions, man it was HELL. anyway the camp comm has been the best people ever, and the dance went smoothly today, apart from the part where huanyang didnt dance. tsktsk. yeahh anyway shall add a new gallery for photos. will post it soon.

but anyway crazeh banana is going away tomorrow :( ahhhhh owell, spent the past two nites talking to her ALOT, thru the night actually. whoa, and it was dam funny what with the compromising situations we appeared to be on cctv, haha nevermind.. but yepp gonna miss the banana! anyway heres a picture of the comm. :)

[the camp comm.]

run to me
If ever you got rain in your heart,
someone has hurt you, and torn you apart,
am I unwise to open up your eyes to love me?

And let it be like they said it would be -
me loving you, and you loving me.
Am I unwise to open up your eyes to love me?

Run to me whenever you're lonely.
Run to me if you need a shoulder
Now and then, you need someone older,
so darling, you run to me.

And when you're out in the cold,
no one beside you, and no one to hold,
am I unwise to open up your eyes to love me?

And when you've got nothing to lose,
nothing to pay for, nothing to choose,
am I unwise to open up your eyes to love me

ok, ive calmed down, or so i think.

being antisocial for awhile helps and being selfish for awhile also helps. phew. anyway thankyou jimmy and winston for the mails and thanks ailing. oh and yeah lingx too for helping me talk all my shit out.. and of cos my dearest cookiemonster, the evilestest person in the world. haha thanks thanks for being there for me and talking to me late into the nights, really appreciate it!! :) yup, gonna dance later, people coming over. need to pack room later. yeah. okay time to study. seeya!

i thank God everyday that i have you to save me all the time!! u may not think uve done much, but im really really lucky to have a great friend like you. thankyou! means alot. :) --> a smiley for you! :)

friendship is depressing isn't it?

you think people mite understand you a little better, but no they dont. you think people would know what you want in life, but hell no. and since you cant be bothered anymore, neither will i. ive been tired for a very long time, hell long. so long i cant even remember when. since it means so little to you then i'm sorry. i tried and im fucking tired of trying. i feel so tired of trying anymore

what the fuck does it matter right? wrong to swear? AIYAH. whatever right?! just becos im christian doesnt mean i have to be a walking angel with a dam halo over my head. i try my best to be as best as i can, and somehow there are always newer expectations to meet everyday. and i always fall short of them. i keep trying but DAMMIT. im so so so so tired.

tired of being an angel. someone please knock it off my head. UGHHHHHHHHHHHH

every single dam person has expectations i need to meet. if i fuck up just ONCE, wah END OF THE WORLD. its like i have to be someone else im not. i cant even find contentment in things i complete. so what if i achieve this or that!? SO WHAT?! I'M NOT HAPPPPPPPPPY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'M DAMMMMMMM NOT BLOOOOODY HAPPPPY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

wah lau its like i try my best to be a good friend, a good cell leader, a good student, a good person overall but FUCK NO. cannot. everything is NEVER ENOUGH!!!!!! u know how blooody frustrating it is!!!!!!!!!!! arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

YAH. DONT CLAIM TO UNDERSTAND ME. cos u so dam fucking DONT. arghhh go awayyyyyy. i wish i could have the liberty to sweep all irritating ppl under the carpet and actually BE selfish and not feel dam bad for being that way.

i hate it. i hate myself. i hate myself for being so hysterical and mad. i hate NOT being in control of myself and my emotions. dammmmmmmit i want to screammmmmmmm

I shall go run. maybe itll de-frustrate me.

wooooooooooooot!!!!!!!!!
alright!!!! hahaha just found out that my nocturnal friend will be in gold coast too at the same time as me and my family!!!! whoa dam cool! haha looking forward to the trip man!! hahaha i wasnt really looking forward to the trip but now i am!! yay!!!!!!! hahaha dam hyper now.. after that long long trip to pasir ris!! grrr hahah.. but yeah happpppy!

hahaha and of cos my ogre pal angiella makes me smile too heh.. and alot of people have made me smile today. zach, josco, cookiemonster!!, angiella, nocturnal friend, jigopa princess! haha thankyou all!! :)

a morning to remember
hahaha i had a really enjoyable morning, as in early morning from like 12-5 haha but very tired now and think im gonna get rheumatism at this rate so i shall talk about it later. heh, going to study tmr, good good, need to get work done! haha.. yeah but before i go back to slumberland, something to share, God really is amazing you know? He really can calm my nerves and sooth my heart at all the right times. really thank Him for granting me patience and peace when i most needed it. after church yesterday i got a little brought down, but i asked God to give me names of people who i could ask to pray for me, and He did, and they did pray for me, and im alot better. thanks :) and thankyou eve:) God really provides! i dont care if ppl call me a pious girl or what, but really, glory to God in the highest :)

and yeah so i try my darnest, but tell me who gives a damn?

im exhausted, absolutely. bleh i need food.

easier
sometimes its easier to be alone
sometimes its easier to keep everything inside
who you're missing, who you're loving
the things that hide you from the world

and sometimes its better to be that way
where no one cares and no one knows
of whats inside, of whats to come
and of whats deep down behind that face
a heart that's hurting
a heart that's bleeding
a heart that's missing you so bad

as all love songs seem to be cliche
i hate to be the one to say
that i am here with all i am
and with all i have
with my arms open wide
with my heart searching endlessly
for possibilities of finding near comfort
in your loving arms.

haven't felt this way for a very long time, and im feeling tired and alone.

dammmmmmiiitttttt i'm missing you. *sigh*

angsty pangsty. i woke up this morning like that. grrr. haha anyway this post is for sarah! happpppy birthday orange!!! :) heh, thanks for being a pal to me.. yup u take care and enjoy your day alright?????? happpppy bday to you dear, love you always!! :)

haha so what happened was that i reached wheelock place at erm about 130 and i met cookiemonster but that silly doofus had to go meet someone at far east so she asked me to sleep in borders till 230!! *grrr* haha so fine i found a very nice spot, and with hard times to shield my indiscreet attempt at sleeping, i ended up actually reading the dam book. haha she came later and nooch's kitchen was closed so we headed to nydc to have lunch. wasnt very hungry but she forced me to finish almost all! i bet she's dam motherproud of me larh! haha so quite happily ate everything den went to marks and spencers to gawk at chocolates and cookies *beams* heh den went to wisma to walk around.. so we headed to topshop where the MOST embarrassing thing happened.

haha i was waving around those big white beads necklace that looked dam ugly larh and i was laughing at how trendy it was and then i dropped it!!!!!!!!!!!! ahhhhhhhhh it was so blooody paiseh i tell you, didnt know what to do and den stupid steph just stood there laughing at me!!!!!!!! ahhhh... so i panic panic and walked dam fast to the corner cos everyone except the topshop staff noticed it. so panic panic i thot die diedie its 16bucks have to pay lor.. but in the end i didnt cos they didnt know it was me. i felt bad and wanted to pay but yeah guess i was too freaked to actually do anything. so i stumbled out feeling bloody bad. hahaha and steph kept saying it was "amusing" ahhhhhhhhhh *shy face* dammmit so paiseh. hahahah..

den met the boys for the sakae sushi student buffet. really eat until can die larh seriously. zach ate till he puked poor darling. and den we ate like 6plates of friend tofu when we were all dying and 12bowls of chawanmushi and 5bowls of miso soup. we had like 50 plates in the end! haha died ah couldnt walk after that.. went for worship prac and nearly died trying to sing. haha but it was amusing, kept teasing poor wendy haha.. and pengpeng. heh. anyway very full still. no sushi for like a year man. haha

anyway hey daughter, thanks for the little favour which means much to me :)

orange juice + one cookie makes up for a bad morning. and im meeting cookiemonster later for lunch haha can torture her with my evilestest ways! haha.. ill prob end up getting bullied again haha

my day sucked like hell but the night was my saving grace. had dinner with locke, we both were pms-ing like shite and we were screaming fck all over but yeah good way to release pent-up frustration. den originally wanted to go my hse and drink but i dont know where the hell the bacardi bottle went so dammit had to make do with coke.. gen came over and she really makes me smile larh, and we were all just being dam retarded over the bachelor women tell all shit haha.. dam cannot make it man. haha but laughing and playing lousy pool sorta made things a little better. it really made my day seem alot less bleaker, but owell evryones stressed rite. so wat e hell.

and did i mention that my appetite is like hell? its either non-existant or decreasing day by day. ahhhh i had wad one curry puff, one hashbrown and like half my dinner today? yeahh ive lost a kilo this week itself man

heh im happier today. *beams*

ahhhhhhhhhhhhh dam dam dam!!!! *screams and tears out hair*

talked to cookiemonster for like 6hrs last nite. can die. so sleepy. woke up this morning like a zombie. haha anyway veryvery sleepy. loooong day.

i feel like writing a song. i shall retreat to my room and lounge around with my guitar and music. haha i always make my room sound dam cosy. but hey.... it sure is!! :) haha and btw i learnt sth today. i can be insanely obvious, and terribly indiscreet! haha but shit wad e hell dont care larh i already try my best to be subtle! haha

All I know is I’m lost without you
I’m not gonna lie
How am I gonna be strong without you
I need you by my side

If we ever said we’ll never be together
and we ended with goodbye
Don’t know what I’d do
I’m lost without you

Everywhere I go I get so confused
You’re the only thing that’s on my mind

now what starts with the letter C?
cookie starts with the letter C!

C is for cookie thats good enough for me!
oh cookie cookie cookie starts with C!

you can scream at me, laugh at me and be angry with me but dont ever tell me what to do with MY life!! gosh i want to be able to sweep irritating people under the carpet.

to all my dearest j2 friends, all the best for a's!!! :) will be praying alotalot for you guys!! strive on ey? just a few weeks to go. yup and to my heroine, you can speak good english. heh all e best!! *hugs*

lead me on
make my heart tender and pure
give me strength, help me endure
in this life, help me stand
hold me close with You i can

with my heart i will obey
with my life all the way
teach me ears to Your will
live my life worshipping

so lead me on, and i will go
lead me on and i will follow
lead me on to where so few have gone
and i will go, i will go.
so lead me on.

today was a good day, im really beginning to enjoy my time with the comm people. danced like crazy again today, introduced new formations and stuff, it was really quite enjoyable. yeah worship was a blast too, really enjoyed playing today and the above song kept ringing in my heart. servanthood and the willingness to say "here i am Lord, send me"

may be cliche to you or even foreign words to you, but very dear to me. :)

you make me smile.

nerd-phase one
today was one of those no-plan days. as in i had plans to meet my jigopa princess for lunch, but the queen was too lazy to travel afar and was in desperate need for sleep, so i apologise princess! haha. made some plans with kai and angie to study at nus around one thirty so decided to head there straight. was awoken by a missed call by gen who was supposedly going to sim to study so ok decided to meet her first since i was already awake. haha but yay she went guthrie instead so it was nearer and i dragged my lazy ass there. studied quite alot, finished a streetcar named desire today. had a good lunch, finished it all up very reluctantly, haha but at least i got it all down!! i felt dam bad after gen said i shouldnt waste, so i ate it all up!! haha proud of me gen? :p heh

anyway did about four hours at guthrie before heading down to nus to meet kai and angie. finished up some summaries and started on history. can die ah, was so tired, and my discman ran out of batt.. so i was so uninspired. haha in the end my bro came to pick me and it was dam funny cos i tricked angie into believing my sisters name was rachelle. haha and she later asked my sister if that was her name.. haha i couldnt stop laughing, was literally rolling abt in laughter. haha.. angie says me and my bro are alike, tricking ppl unexpectedly haha.. so funny hehe. kk i must do more work!! haha

need to prepare cell word soon!

One day I'll fly away
Leave all this to yesterday.
What more could your love do for me?
When will love be through with me?
Why live life from dream to dream?
And dread the day when dreaming ends

did alot of studying in the past week. feel like a nerd.
gonna study more tomorrow. haii.

"let the clouds that darken the skies fill my empty heart"

tonnes of new pictures!! haha freshly uploaded!!
[new photos.]

see them for yrself. errr the username is user and the password is.. haha extremely classified cos of certain photos.. ask me for the pword.

lullaby
early morning, gentle rain
sleepless nights, gone with the wind
humming a tune softly to the sky
twinkling stars all wondering why

and this is how it goes
my sweet, sweet lullaby

i hope you can hear me
these words that i say
the love i had given
i gave it all away
i knew that if i had the chance
i would say without missing a word
that i love you, and ill sing for you
my sweet, sweet lullaby

cookiemonster, i didnt run away!

haha this is cookiemonster. she used to really freak me out cos she was a meanie. but thats a long story in itself. haha anyway i met her again since those dreaded acjc days where she did nothing but give me mean glances :( but she says its not fair cos she didnt know. but owell. haha she's a nice pal now. see! im not so scared now =) heh. thanks steph for hearing me whine! :) hahah.. errr yr not mean! and not scary!! :)

anyway.. HAPPY BIRTHDAY SHARON!!!!!!
haha my dearest sponsor, uve been such a great friend who's done so many things in my life that has shaped me the way i am now. thanks for everything and for walking with me in my spiritual walk. haha i can imagine u saying a meek "thank you" hahahaah!! take care!! i do love you!! =)

beks is bored.
[x.] name = beks! heh
[x.] piercings = one on each ear.. nothing more!!! :s
[x.] tattoos = where? where? WHERE???
[x.] height = 156.5! heh
[x.] shoe size = 5? i have teeny feet.
[x.] hair color = errr.. reddish brown. yes. reddish brown.
[x.] length = just past my shoulders
[x.] siblings = one bimbotic sister and one errr idiotic brother :p
[x.] pets = my dog is.. well.. i dont have a dog? hmmm

LAST:
[x.] movie you rented = haha cant rmb but i must have taken a dam long to return it.
[x.] movie you bought = charlies angel full throttle!! *leaps*
[x.] song you listened to = wonderful by everclear! i likeee!
[x.] song that was stuck in your head = sometimes love just aint enough
[x.] thing you've downloaded = haha err a j.timberlake video to see dance moves haha
[x.] cd you bought = parachute band - glorious
[x.] cd you listened to = parachute band - amazing! haha
[x.] person you've called = daniel! my broo!!
[x.] person that's called you = errrm.. my brother too!!
[x.] tv show you've watched = uh....... the nine oclock show last nite haha
[x.] person you were thinking of = haha cookiemonster. cos she's so hyper!

[x.] you have a bf or gf = where? haha
[x.] you have a crush on someone = yes. im sitting on her now. hahaha
[x.] you wish you could live somewhere else = not really. *sings* this is homeeeee trullyyyyyyy!
[x.] you think about suicide = very rarely
[x.] you believe in online dating = nah
[x.] you want more piercings = *screams* it could get louderrrrrr
[x.] you want more tattoos = ehhh let me find the first one first?
[x.] you drink = yeah i do. nothing more den casual drinking
[x.] you do drugs = haha yes! now wheres my medcine. hmmmm
[x.] you smoke = yeah im hot baby. haha shit im getting dam corny
[x.] you like cleaning = i can be obsessive with my room.
[x.] you like roller coasters = YEAH~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BRING IT ON!!!! =P
[x.] you write in cursive or print = mix of both. :p
[x.] you carry a donor card = hmm for myself yes. haha

For or Against..
[x.] teenage smoking = against!
[x.] doing drugs = against
[x.] premarital sex = against
[x.] driving drunk = against
[x.] soap operas = days of our lives is a big NONO!!

Best...
[x.] tv show = locke will insist its HOLLAND V. hahaha
[x.] thing in the world = is joy counted? hmmm
[x.] thing to collect = memories. :)
[x.] colors of all time = blue, white, black and orange!!! =p
[x.] thing to do on a rainy day = sit on my bed with a book with jazz playing =)
[x.] feeling in the world = when my friends are happy :)

Have you...
[x.] ever cried over a guy = haha i would put that down as a yes.
[x.] ever lied to someone = and feeling dam guilty after that. yes.
[x.] ever been in a fist fight = yes. hohoho!

What...
[x.] Perfume do you use = ralph, tommy hilfiger, issey!
[x.] shoes do you wear = sports shoes, slippers, sandals
[x.] are you scared of = losing my loved ones. :(

Number...
[x.] of continents I have lived in? three. US, HK and SG. ahha im blabbering.
[x.] of drugs taken illegally? err.. zero? haha
[x.] of people I would classify as true, could trust with my life type friends? four.
[x.] of people I consider my enemies? i have enemies?! WHERE?!
[x.] of times my name has appeared in the newspaper? im under this part. "...and her three children" hahaha
[x.] of scars on my body? i dont know. im not wack enough to count them?!

Have you ever...
[x.] Fallen for your best friend? sorta!
[x.] Made out with JUST a friend? no..........
[x.] Been in love? what does it mean by being in love?
[x.] Cheated on someone? i dont think so.. hmm.. i dont think so. haha

Who was the last person...
[x.] You touched? uh. i dont know!
[x.] You talked to? my little orange. :)
[x.] You hugged? i cant remember leh. my lumcheong. *bolster*

Have you/are you/do you....
[x.] Considered a life of crime? yes! stealing to save the poor. haha as if.
[x.] Considered being a hooker? uh no.
[x.] Considered being a pimp? haha waittttt.................. there was some talk abt that........
[x.] Are you psycho? arent we all? =)
[x.] Split personalities? tonnes! haha hello! hi. heyyyyy. halohalo! alo! hahaha
[x.] Schizophrenic? i consider myself one. haha
[x.] Obsessive compulsive? at timesssssssssssss. i cant stop pressing the s key. ssssssssssss
[x.] Panic? oh NONONO. im as calm as the sea. goodness. stupid qn.
[x.] Anxiety? read abovee... im still stuck on the ssssss key.
[x.] Depressed? have you depressed? what kinda weird phrasing is that? i have no depressed. haha
[x.] Obsessed with hate? i try to love myself more. hmmmm
[x.] Dream of mutilated bodies, blood, death, and gore? yah if im freddy or jason larh. haha
[x.] Dream of doing those things instead of just seeing them? wheres freddy?

Are you...
[x.] Understanding: i can be.
[x.] Open-minded: depends on how YOU see it right? haha
[x.] Interesting: you be the judge.
[x.] Hungry: YESYESYES!! jigopa princess ate 3/4 my fooddddd!!!! oh dear now its the d key. hmm
[x.] Friendly: yes!!!! friendly and approachable!!! =p
[x.] Childish: all the time. haha *grin*
[x.] Healthy: well..............
[x.] Difficult: yes!! go away now!! heh
[x.] Thirsty: kinda. i want milk.
[x.] Responsible: i try my best.
[x.] Sad: dont u get it!?!! im happpy!!! haiYOOOOOO.
[x.] Happy: lalala yesyesyesyes!!!! i feel like a shampoo ad. hmm
[x.] Trusting: unfortunately so, too trusting.
[x.] Talkative: haha have u seen a bullet train? thats my twin heh
[x.] Lonely: i have God. :)
[x.] Own a webcam? yes but i cant figure out where the gonkers in the world it is.
[x.] Ever get off the damn computer? i do okayyyyyyyyyy

Currents
[x.] Current Clothes: rg old pe tee and fbts.
[x.] Current Mood: light and hyper!! =)
[x.] Current Taste: strawberry pokey!!
[x.] Current Hair: all over. what hair?
[x.] Current Annoyance: ehhh... my foot is itchy.
[x.] Current Smell: blocked nose darling blocked nose.
[x.] Current thing you ought to be doing: scratching my feet. haha
[x.] Current Book: a streetcar named desire. beautiful and intelligent play.
[x.] Current DVD In Player: charlies angel the first one!!
[x.] Current Refreshment: i cant find any on my table!
[x.] Current Worry: it was the cookiemonster. but no more!
[x.] Current Crush: as i said, im sitting on her.

On Dating....
[x.] Long or short hair? short and neat.
[x.] Dark or blond hair? tussled blond hair would be dreamy
[x.] Tall or short? im short so...... taller den me larh
[x.] Mr. Sensitive or Mr. Funny? sensitive? theres no snag now! so funny!!
[x.] Good boy or bad boy? bring the punk rockers out baby!
[x.] Dark or light eyes? light eyes are nice!!!
[x.] Pierced or no? ears only please.


On preferences....
[x.] Chocolate milk or hot chocolate? hot choc keeps me warm and frothy!
[x.] McDonalds or Burger King? depends on which im less sick of.
[x.] Marry the perfect lover or the perfect friend? the perfect friend.
[x.] Sweet or sour? sweeeeet
[x.] Root Beer or Dr. Pepper? dr pepper on bad days. root beer on good days :)
[x.] Sappy/action/comedy/horror? comedy or sapppy sobby ones!!
[x.] Cats or dogs? chickens. im hungry sorrryyyy
[x.] Ocean or Pool? oceaN
[x.] Cool Ranch or Nacho Cheese? nahco cheeeseeeeee yuimmmmmeh!!!!
[x.] Mud or Jell-O wrestling? jell-o wrestling!! yummy!
[x.] With or without ice-cubes? with please, and half a teaspoon of salt with my coke pls.
[x.] Shine or rain? pros and cons for both. i love the rain tho.
[x.] Winter/Summer/Fall/Spring? winter!! cold and cosy.
[x.] Vanilla or Chocolate? vanilla!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
[x.] Gloves or mittens? the little baby mittens!! =p
[x.] Eyes open or closed? depends on my imagination.
[x.] Fly or breathe under water? fly!!! the world will be mine!! muahahaha haha
[x.] Bunk-bed or waterbed? waterwaterbed!!!! =p
[x.] Chewing gum or hard candy? hard candyyy.. its suckyy. hahaha shit im getting worse. haha
[x.] Motor boat or sailboat? motorboat when im in a hurry of cos!! =)
[x.] Lights on or off? off! who knows what you can be doing. haha

i hate the way you make me wonder how life would be like without you.

but im stronger then you think i am. and i'll show you how i stand on my own two feet and walk tall. i'll show you that each time i trip and fall, i'll pick myself up just to let you know that you can't break me as much as you thought you could.

we're all a little psycho right? as much as it might hurt for just awhile, i could live life without you.

so bloody strange.

some new photos!
sleepycow. the space between heh
heroine saves the day.
haha niceLEE done.
how pretty! dam unglam larh!!
the harvest is plentiful heh
my little godbrother
the cutest couple
haha happy family.
a beautiful sunset.
sulky pouty smilies

im so sleeeeepy now and its all the cookie monsters fault!! teehee. haha
diediedie going out to study again.

surely Your mercy has delivered me.
You gave Your life for me, now im Yours forevermore.

red wine makes me rosy posy
haha yeah it does. went to study at kap with kairen, angie and huahui and it was really quite productive. did quite alot. quite happy with what ive done. yup. den was really tired but somehow or another when my bro picked me i decided to join him and hsia ling for supper/drinks. so being the mambojumboblurpok i am, haha i ordered red wine. french! haha. it was happy hour all nite at this pub that was called Bar Celona. haha read that fast. dam funny. anyway im really red now.

on a sadder note, why do friends take each other for granted. i feel very.. ahhh i hate to use this word but i feel so used. its like when they need me im there, if not, i become thrashh. very strange world indeed. and if you think its abt u.. its not :)

going to sleep. haha

daily devotional
Pleasing God and making our life matter. We often get so caught up in
living of our lives day to day , it is easy to forget why God has given us
this wonderful gift of life. It is to serve and glorify Him. That is the
bottom line of why we are here. Unfortunately, we can get far, far away
from that purpose during the course of our years here on earth. Obviously,
one of the enemies goals is to keep us distracted so that we cannot fulfill
that God-given purpose. Once a person comes to know Christ by faith, the
enemy has lost the battle for that person's soul. However, the battle then
centers around making us as ineffective as possible in serving God in our
daily lives. The more he can keep us distracted with the burden's of life,
the less effective we are in our service to God.

This passage of scripture in Isaiah58:7 helps us to focus on what this life is
really all about. It is not about seeing how much wealth we can accumulate
in this life, or how much power we can acquire, or how well-known we can
become. All of the things the world judges us by are absolutely meaningless
when this brief journey is over. It is the wood, hay, and stubble the Bible
talks about that will burn up when tested by fire (1 Corinthians 3:12-15).
The gold, silver, and precious stones are those things we do in this life
that stand the test of eternity. It is our true service to our Lord.

If you want a starting point of how to please God, what kinds of things we
can do in our life to follow our Lord and have an eternal legacy, get your
Bible out and read verse 7 in the 58th chapter of Isaiah. This is what our
life really is all about. Being there for those in need. Helping those who
are lost in this life. Sharing the love and hope of Jesus Christ with those we
meet along our journey.

we should be dancing!!

dance, dance, dance the night away!!!