it's time to move on, sadly.
deleting this blog would be like deleting my memories. :(

so i'll just leave it for now.

new strength each day, greater faith everyday!

to all my batchmates collecting their results, all the best! i'm praying for you, i really am. you should be getting it about now. take care of all you :)

you: i can't believe i'm saying this.. but i.. i love you! *blush

haha.

"What you thought was real in life, somehow steer you wrong. And now you just keep trying and trying to find where you belong"

this road i'm on - 3 doors down

its strange cos i really thought for once that i had found common ground. but looks like i'm still as lost as when i started. running in circles, chasing rainbows, where will this all lead me? will i find anything? everytime i feel this sinking nothingness, i cant help but blame myself and you for landing me in this situation. but no, you are perfect and surely the fault must lie with me.

i wish i could be you
woke up aching and partially deaf. how lousy is that? owell maybe a hint for me to start exercising. anyway unkle was not bad last night, but angie kai jud wendy and me had a little more fun mambo-ing at the other side. heh it was dam funny and really quite relaxing. apart from the nauseating amount of people, the music was good and erm, friendly. haha it was a sorta good closure to a very bad morning and afternoon, and i guess ultimately no matter how bad my day is, i still thank God! :)

listening to: the scientist by coldplay

"oh you of little faith, you have a God so much bigger then you!"

i'm still alarmingly in happy spirits, that can only be a good thing right? anyway i really need to trust God on my university education. please pray that i'll be able to find direction in where He wants to lead me. i have a strong preference for psych and english, but i shall surrender it entirely to God. which of cos is the hardest thing. but yes, oh me of little faith, gotta believe. amen.

smelling the coffee
i spent this entire morning in absolute gaiety. i'm extremely gratified with my progress in work and i look forward to an afternoon of luxurious reading, to the sounds of norah jones and james taylor. it is pleasing to wake up in happy spirits, and to have not one thing distemper me ever since! going to start reading chaucer later and i reckon it to be a prosaic sorta book but yeah it won't bring my spirits down! a wonderful closure to the morning came in the form of news from a very dear friend, very very unexpected, yet very very much appreciated :)

got to grab a quick munch then back to the books :)

you: thank you for the call, it was really very lovely and it really made me smile

songwriting and wedding bells
haha if yr going WTF now.. YEAH! haha its dam off lah but i just got off the phone. so a little bit high and all. supposed to be dam tired and unhappy or seriously mackers, but surprisingly im not! the grace of God! anyway was speaking to alex first. it was really quite strange cos i havent talked to him for ages, and he let me listen to his songs and encouraged me to write more of my own, so yepp i will. its really good talking to him again cos i always learn something new from him everytime. haha now im hooked to james taylor and david tao cos of some of his recommendations so yeh! quite happy, gonna attempt writing songs when inspiration comes :)

den gen called and yeh we were planning her future wedding. hahahaha its dam hilarious cos it really WILL be amazing if any of what we said would really happen in the future. hahaha *throws flowers into the air* haha amazing i tell you. extremely retarded also. but yeah its always comforting to talk to her cos she's one of the few people who can make me laugh - GENuinely.(oh my my im so dam corny) haha and yeh so thanks to my ideals about songwriting generously taught to me by alex and thanks to gen for making me laugh, i can sleep well tonight. hehe

ooh its morning already!! CAFFEINE HIGH maybe. heh life never felt this good!

sometimes i wonder why the hell i punish myself this way.

punish myself with memories that never cease to hurt.
punish myself with words that seem to lose its meaning day by day
punish myself with me missing an unexpected you(sometimes i couldd shoot myself for being THIS insane) and i wish i could just..

will it all away.