whats it like to feel?

listening to : love song by third day
current mood : don't quite know. :( negative i suppose

i.. dont know how to express myself well. things come out wrongly, things i dont like to talk about get talked about, and i end up making a big mess. im tired, and thats all i know for now. because life is one big joke and we end up in debates about practically everything --> no specific reference or whatsoever. and i cannot rebutt/retort no matter how hard i try, because my thoughts are always jumbled up, and i always return with a nonsensical answer. sad isnt it? not cut out to be a debater. guess we cant be good at everything. and it frustrates me when i know my point and my stand, but i fail to convey it due to my inconsistencies. and it sucks because i know what i feel and all, but i just cant put it across.

and thats when it gets tiring.

and then i dont really know what i feel anymore.